UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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