Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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