She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
