I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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