Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
