sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
