Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Also, beer. Big fan.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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