If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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