i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
