Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
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