i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
