How'd it feel making her break her religion?
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
