OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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