She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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