i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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