just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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