SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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