Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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