I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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