My room smells like vodka and shame
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
