just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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