he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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