I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
