Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
