Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
