honey bunches of taint.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
