Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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