it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
is that a dick in a sweater?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
