I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
