what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize