she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
