Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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