Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
