there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
