Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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