Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
God, I missed his penis.
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