Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Randomize
