i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Randomize
