halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize