Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
