she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize