A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize