just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
