I think im going to throw up on grandma
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Randomize
