just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
