I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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