Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
