Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
time to smoke my breakfast
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
