OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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