Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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